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LiveJournal for Into Dust.

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Thursday, December 25th, 2003

Time:1:12 pm.
Merry Christmas

Thursday, October 30th, 2003

Time:12:42 pm.
Mood: rejected.

if they're going to be like that...

then just get them to leave me alone.


Sunday, August 24th, 2003

Time:4:08 pm.
blah. i feel gross.

Sunday, August 3rd, 2003

Time:5:49 pm.
ok well i just downloaded this client thingy. its pretty damn cool if i do say so myself.

you know what i want?

i want a daddy.Collapse )

Saturday, July 5th, 2003

Subject:stolen from manda
Time:1:34 am.
Mood: tired.
- Last dream: my dad...i finally got ahold of him, and he came to visit me. i dont actually think i've ever dreamt of him.
- Last car ride: *ponders* yesterday maybe?
- Last good cry: been a while i think (a while for me is like, quite a few days or a week)
- Last Missing Library Book: a book the librarian recommended to me that i actually returned, but the barcode was missing, so they "lost" it. damn peoples.
- Last movie seen: frequency (great movie)
- Last Book Read: define "normal" (also really great)
- Last cuss word uttered: shit probably
- Last beverage drank: some of kateri's mountain dew
- Last Food consumed: pasta
- Last phone call: kateri
- Last TV show watched: eh, monk, but kateri's been watching some weird crap, lol.
- Last Item Bought: candy (wanted to get some make up, but CVS JUST closed.)
- Last time showered: today
- Last shoes worn: sandals
- Last CD played: POD of course
- Last downloaded: eh, i dunno, my mom kinda took my comp away from me :-\
- Last annoyance: my drunken stepfather
- Last disappointment: my stomache i think
- Last soda drank: pepsi right out of the bottle :)
- Last thing written: besides my last sentence? a poem
- Last key used: backspace
- Last word spoken: that
- Last trip to the bathroom: um...earlier today?
- Last sleep: last night/this morning
- Last IM: laura
- Last sexual fantasy: o.O
- Last orgasm: O.o
- Last weird encounter: uh when christina told me about blaine i guess
-Last Store Shopped at: CVS
- Last ice cream eaten: not quite sure.
- Last time amused: about 5 mins ago
- Last time wanting to die: fairly recently
- Last time hugged: when my parents were saying goodnight
- Last time scolded: i actually havent been scolded that much today (yeah big surprise to me)
- Last time resentful: always
- Last chair sat in: the...one i'm sitting in?
- Last lipstick used: dont wear it
- Last shirt worn: actually that is a good one cuz im not exactly wearing a shirt right now (still in my bathing suit). black sleeveless (took it off about a min after i put it on cuz it was really hot in my room)
- Last class attended: oy i DONT want to think about school right now.
- Last Final taken: ENGLISH! i got a A on it too!!1
- Last time dancing: o.O i think when i went over hannah's and she wanted to dance, so we danced to "crazy in love" and some song of her choice from the 80's or 70's
- Last poster looked at: the monkey one in my room
- Last show attended: dunno
- Last webpage visited: allpoetry.com

Thursday, June 12th, 2003

Time:11:43 pm.
Mood: scared.
there is something so incredibly wrong with me. and i dont know what it is.

i'm so fucking scared and upset right now. i dont know how to help myself. i feel so torn between my pride and my fear.

and nobody wants to help me either. its just like i thought it would be. so many of them are starting to get so pissed off at me and annoyed with me. i cant live without them...i cant make it.

the reason i wanted to die so badly was becuase i'm so scared of life. i know that what i'm going thru is puny compared to the pain i will feel in the future, and if i dont know how to deal with this, how the HELL am i going to deal with all the crap im going to have to deal with in the future?

i feel so lonely too. it seems like everytime something goes wrong with one or a few of my friends, i go crazy. i cant handle it. i cant handle not being friends with people. its the extreme of the "i can never be happy with what i have because im always focusing on what i dont have". i'm so dead serious.


i need friends so badly right now :'(

Monday, June 9th, 2003

Time:11:17 pm.
Mood: scared.
i love you so much

and i cant stop it.

somebody please, save me.

Friday, June 6th, 2003

Time:12:20 am.
Mood: nervous.
sometimes it really does surprise me how much people care about me.

it makes me so grateful too.

thank you everyone...i dont know what i would do without you...

Thursday, June 5th, 2003

Time:12:46 am.
Mood: loved.
i wrote this in your journal too, nia, but i really need you to know this, so i'm putting it here too.

i read the entry about me and sam a lot.

it makes me feel so freaking special. i dont think i have ever felt so loved.
it makes me feel so good that i want to cry.
nia, i love you too. i hope i never ever lose you.


Thursday, May 15th, 2003

Time:1:46 am.

"All Because Of You"

Something's wrong with me,
Cause I can't even feel you now
Or know that this is real.
Am I blind to see that there's something there behind your eyes
And it's bringing me to my knees.
All I want is you and I don't care
All I want is you and I don't care
Cause all I do is wait in, wondering and hoping, that we'll survive it.
I know that all this is true.
All because of you.
Something's wrong with you,
The walls you build around you now,
Seem to fit you like a glove.
Something's wrong with you,
Cause stars cannot be found in clouds that cover up their love.
Cause all I do is wait in, wondering and hoping, that we'll survive it.
I know that all this is true.
All because of you.

Wednesday, April 30th, 2003

Subject:quiz rampage
Time:2:50 am.
Mood: tired.
haha, dont you just love me for getting this?

You're not so much depressed as you're totally
freaking insane. Kati would be friends with you
because she's just like you. You could stay
over her house and make pasta and biscuits at 4
am. You're also astoundingly similar to Invader
Zim's GIR. Viva la little robots wearing green
dog suits! Let's make biscuits!

How Depressed are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

You have a mysterious kiss. Your partner never
knows what you're going to come up with next;
this creates great excitement and arousal never
knowing what to expect. And it's sure to end
in a kiss as great as your mystery.

What kind of kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

You're Perfect ^^
-Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend. Which
means you're rare or that you cheated :P You're
the kind of chick that can hang out with your
boyfriend's friends and be silly. You don't
care about presents or about going to fancy
placed. Hell, just hang out. You're just happy
being around your boyfriend.

What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

haha, this is so true, right?:
cooler than the fonz!
I'm just a cool person. People like me.

Why do people read your Livejournal?
brought to you by Quizilla

You're the sad smile,the one that regrets nearly
everything and is constantly wondering about
what could have been.You're not happy with your
situation and usually blame yourself because of
the bad things that have happened.Cheer up.

What Kind of Smile are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

i think i'll redo that one:
You're the smirk,a frown-smile hybrid that's a
little bit cocky and usually associated with
evil or arrogant,but attractive people.You
probably just don't give a damn,but it's
everyone else's fault if you don't because
you're too awesome to have any real faults.

What Kind of Smile are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

mmkay...thass a li'l better

HAHAHA!! i thought this was wicked funny, and i have NO idea how i got it:
eating people

what's YOUR deepest secret?
brought to you by Quizilla


Mark your calendar or Palm V. You can expect to die on:

October 24, 2053
at the age of 65 years old.

On that date you will most likely die from:

Contagious Disease (37%)
Cancer (27%)
Horrible Accident (6%)
Third Degree Burns (5%)
Heart Attack (5%)

Interesting stats from the DeathTest:

12680327 people have taken the DeathTest.
Of those, 55% were female and 45% were male.
The average life expectancy of test takers is 67 years.
10% of test takers have hairy nipples.
4% have had team sex.
8% work in the porn business.
And 234291 people claim to have leprosy.

Disclaimer: We, despite being proficient with the human anatomy, are not doctors. Keep that in mind before calling your lawyer as you're clutching your left arm moaning "Damn you, Spark, Damn YOU!" on October 24, 2053, as you slip silently into the night.

ooook, i just took the lazy test, but of COURSE, something is wrong with it, so i couldnt get the results *pouts*

oh well, i think i've done enough quizzes to kill someone ;-)


Saturday, April 26th, 2003

Subject:a fun little "excercise" for y'all to fill out
Time:1:56 pm.
What Do YOU Think of Me?
1. Quiet or loud?:
2. Short or tall?:
3. Weird or original?:
4. Cute or sexy?:
5. Nice or mean?:
6. Friendly or selfish?:
7. Normal or special?:
8. Smart or stupid?:
9. Boring or fun?:
10. Attractive or unattractive?:

1. A psycho?:
2. Athletic?:
3. A nerd?:
4. A slut?:
5. Ghetto?:
6. A Bitch?:
7. A Player?:
8. Two-faced?:
9. Obnoxious?:
10. Immature or mature?:

1. Do you think I'll get married?:
2. If you do, who do you think I'll marry?:
3. When is my birthday?:
4. Who is my best friend?:
5. What song (if any) reminds you of me?:
6. Do I remind you of any characters on TV?:
7. What animal am I most like?:
8. If you could re-name me, what would you call me?:
9. Have you ever had a dream about me?:
10. Do you think I'm a virgin?:
11. If you could give me anything, what would it be?:

PERSONAL: (you don't hafta answer dis part if you're
of the same sex)
1. Am I (physically) ugly, average, decent, good-
looking, beautiful, or hot?:
2. Would you ever kiss me?:
3. Have we ever kissed?:
4. Would you ever consider being my boy/girlfriend?:
5. Do you ever think about me off-line?:
6. If we spent a day together, where would we go &
what would we do?:
7. If you could describe me in one word what would it be?:
8. Do you or did you ever have a crush on me?:
9. Do you wish we were closer?:
10. Do you love me?:

11. State your completely honest opinion of me here:

and BE HONEST! lol

Tuesday, April 15th, 2003

Time:12:39 am.
Mood: cold.
tomatoes!!!!! hehe, nia

hehehehehe, like my new background?! *smiles at self*

listenin to the song again...actually did cry last night.


argh, my keyboard is being wicked majorly annoying. i cant WAIT to get my own NEW computer for my birthday :-D



LiveJournal for Into Dust.

View:User Info.
You're looking at the latest 13 entries.